Turbulence and Toilets

Hey guys, so flight attendant story for you. I was on a tiny 200 plane the other day. You know, the one where the tall guys have to stoop over in half and the big boned have to scoot sideways. So anyway, this above middle aged man who was definitely on the big boned side got on with a cane in each hand. I assisted him to his seat and saw that the buckle wasn’t going to fit. So I gave him a seat belt extender, helped him buckle it and showed him how to tighten it. As I went to hand it to him to finish tightening, he says, “oh you don’t want to wrap your arms all the way around and finish it?” Nope.

Just setting the scene for what’s to come. Shortly after, we are airborne…just 15 mins into a short 50 min flight. I am in the galley preparing service, just after making the announcement to stay seated with the seatbelt sign on. I look out and spy Mr. Man up out of his seat and almost back to the bathroom. Here’s the kicker. We were in turbulence. And he has 2 canes. So by the time I can get to him, he is in the bathroom. I start service and keep an eye out for him. This is a tiny little bathroom, so he has a hard time fitting and the door keeps jostling open. I move to the back and as I do he flings the door open dramatically, huffing and puffing through a sweaty upper lip. He speaks loudly, “That was AWFUL! I am going to sue the airline!” I look calmly back and state, “I’m sorry sir. But we did announce that everyone should stay seated and the seat belt sign is on. Also, we are experiencing some turbulence which is another reason we wanted everyone to stay safe and seated.” He huffed and puffed his way back to his seat, bumping heads along the way as he tried to keep balance. I walked with him. As he plopped heavily back into his seat he stated, “They should make a movie of that.” Ironically we experienced no more turbulence for the rest of the flight.

Honestly the whole situation was a little amusing to me, because who gets up in the middle of turbulence? And then later I thought to myself, “well I guess I have sometimes”. Meaning, I have seen warning signs in certain situations and with certain people. I have experienced some big bumps and bruises and felt very off kilter in my gut. But I pushed through and insisted it work. I didn’t listen to the signs, and I got jostled around. Maybe got a little “pee” on me. And then stated loudly to God, “I should sue!” Yep I’m that person. Those seat belt signs were on, and the announcements were there, but I just turned up the volume on those earbuds and stood up anyway. Just a thought. 

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New Yorker, photographer, blogger, and life time dreamer.